Zeder: Passover 2020

The Carlin Clan's Transcontinental Zeder

We had a transcontinental (but not transatlantic) family seder via Zoom: a zeder. It was short and sweet. A best-of version. About half the time ended up dedicated to getting my parents' connection sorted out. First they could hear the rest of us but not see us, then we could hear but not see them, and so forth. We chiseled away at it, occasionally tempted to accept a partial solution, but no-- we wanted it all and finally we got it. The wisdom of the generations prevailed. Daughters and grandchildren offered advice. Sons-in-law wisely sat back and sipped wine. (They know the drill.) My mother, who has a close but tempestuous relationship with her phone and refuses to touch a computer, pressed the final button that made the whole thing work. 

I had found an online Haggadah that we could all share; my middle sister abridged it; and Simon led the ceremonies. In sum, it captured the spirit of Passover very well, and the spirit of these pandemic times surprisingly well too. We had the four questions and the four kinds of children and we dipped and dipped again; we tasted bitter and salt. The intoning of the ten plagues resonated more than it usually does. Would anyone believe me if I said I had smeared a bit of lamb's blood on mine doorpost? (Beware, angel of death.) We washed hands (of course). When we reached the 'Shulchan Aroch', the 'long table',  we signed off and scattered to our own time zones and small tables and enjoyed our festive but quiet meals.

Afterward, those of us in Toronto proceeded with a hunt for the 'afikomen'- a half-piece of ceremonial matzo essential for completing the ritual--and succeeded in finding it before the dog did. In exchange for its safe return by its captors--aka our children--we promised them an Easter egg hunt on the following Sunday. 

As Father Ted would say, it's an ecumenical matter.



I  

I 


can’t imagine being happy to let the kids outside to play with friends. I can’t imagine choosing to be in a crowd of people, to sit in a cinema or a theatre or an airplane or to wander a supermarket’s aisles. Okay maybe the kids can go to a park and play frisbee standing far far apart. Eli did that the other day in Vancouver.I can’t imagine being happy to let the kids outside to play with friends. I can’t imagine choosing to be in a crowd of people, to sit in a cinema or a theatre or an airplane or to wander a supermarket’s aisles. Okay maybe the kids can go to a park and play frisbee standing far far apart. Eli did that the other day in Vancouver.